Create your balance. Design your life.

Ask Madeleine Vol.14

Need a fresh perspective? Ask Madeleine.  She’s four and has no problem telling you exactly what to do.  Send in your questions–comment below, use the contact link, or post them on our Facebook page.


How can I relax more behind the wheel? I get road rage.

Madeleine:  Honk your horn. You feel better.  Honk, honk, honk!!  You can scream. [That helps you relax?] Yes. Say, “Why did you do that to me?!!” People will move, move, move.

Stinky Old Mom: I’m immediately concerned that she has learned this from me!  Also, I’m concerned she thinks this is normal “calm” driving.  Although, I will say, there is something cathartic about honking and is not the answer.  After reading this article, I felt a tad bit better.  At least I’m not the only one out there who has to earn to demonstrate more control around little ears!

Edmunds gives ten tips for helping end the anger.  These are my favorites: get enough sleep, make sure you have enough time, turn down the music, loosen up and breathe, hostility is toxic.  You can also take this test to see your level of aggressiveness behind the wheel.  Our little ones are listening. Let’s show them we can handle the road without acting like crazy people.  Maybe they can be better than us in about 16 years.


What can you do if you have a long commute?

Madeleine:  I would drive a mini-car. Pink painted all over it.  Or you can not use a car; you can use an air plane and go faster.

Stinky Old Mom:  The first step to dealing with a long commute is accepting all the decisions that you made that resulted in the long commute.  There is a reason you chose to commute in the first place.  Next, use the time for reflection, mindfulness, kindness, ore self-improvement.  Listen to new music or use the time for an audio book.  The point is, a long commute doesn’t seem as bad if you are taking advantage of that time.  For me, I have to really make sure I focus on a positive practice (and purposely put myself in the right frame of mind) in order to avoid letting the drivers around me affect my mood.

Don’t let your commute stress you out.  If you really can’t stand it anymore, change it.  Get a different job, a transfer, or approach your boss about telecommuting a few days a week.

If you know someone at work is doing something they shouldn’t, what should you do?

Madeleine: I would say, “Don’t do that friend, or I’ll tell.”  I don’t want to get in trouble.

Stinky Old Mom:  This is a tough one.  You have to really go with your instincts on this.  There are any levels of “wrong,” from taking home a few pens to embezzlement.  Trust in your ability to do the right thing.  Madeleine brings up a good point with her answer; you do not want to be associated with the wrongdoing.  Many HR departments have some kind of internal reporting procedure in place.  If you feel comfortable using this route, you can put in an anonymous report and let the company decide a course of action.  For larger, more pervasive wrongdoing, there are “whistle-blower attorneys.”  You might want to look into protecting yourself first by seeking legal counsel.


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