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The Salon: The Comment That Changed Your Life

Join the discussion!!!  The Salon is a forum for us to think new thoughts and engage with each other in relation to ideas rather than events.

“Don’t go the next 20 years allowing one negative comment to hold you back. You are not who people say you are.” –Joel Osteen

I take “motivation” where I can get it.  People in the midst of creation need constant sources of insight, support, and encouragement.  It can be a very lonely place.

Although I do not address spirituality in this forum, and I wouldn’t know what to say if I did, I do find Joel Osteen to have fantastic views on motivation, leadership, and positivity. The sentiment remains that YOU are designed to be unique.  You define you.

How many of us are consciously deciding who we are?

Now is the time to sit down and actually, legitimately, think about who you want to be.  Stop reading, if you have to, and use the next minute giving actual thought to the person you would like to be (and have others see).

I posted this article about morning routines on our Facebook page.  It really got me thinking about how little time we have–and how we need to put a little effort into using it wisely.  In the article, James Clear figures time in this way, “If we use these average life expectancy numbers and assume that your adult life starts at 18 years old, then you’ve got about 68 years as an adult. (86 – 18 = 68) Perhaps a little less on average. A little more if you’re lucky. (68 years as an adult) x (365 days each year) = 24,820 days. ”  If I use my current age subtracted from 77 (the age my father was at his passing), I get 15,330 more mornings.  How do I want to use those mornings?  

Let’s stop being so passive.  Let’s grab as many moments as we can, with a tight grip, and choose the person we are in those moments.  The more we can do that, the more we are living our life with intentional design, the more we feel fulfilled.

How many of us define ourselves in reaction to others rather than in pro-action?

I cannot even begin to count the number of times I have reacted to a comment, hurt feelings, and anger.  In those moments, I was not living as I intended, I was striking out against some outside force.  This is especially true as it relates to my weight.  After countless knee-jerk diets, binge-fests, and insane pills and supplements, I’m just now getting a handle on how deeply rooted my “triggers” are and how long I let those comments affect me.  In the past, the “diet” I thought I’d started “for real this time” might have been a reaction rather than purposeful.  Those were never successful.  Real change, and real success, comes when your decision is conscious and controlled.   I’m not always winning, but I’m no longer “reacting.”

What comment lingers in your heart that you need to banish?  Does it motivate you to action or keep you prisoner to a certain path you keep trying to “prove wrong?”

Anger and fear can be great motivators, but I wonder if it pushes us to stay on a certain path.  For example, if someone in your math class called you “stupid” and said that you couldn’t do it, does your response to that comment keep you chained to a belief you are trying to prove wrong?  Sure, you could work hard in school to be better at the subject.  You could let that anger push you to become a mathematician!  What if you let anger move you away from other possible paths?

On the flip side, I let certain comments in my past become beliefs.  They most certainly kept me AWAY from a path I really could have taken.  Though I love the person I am and life that I have, I vow not to let that happen again.  For the next half of my life I will be in control of my beliefs.

What positive comment opened your eyes?  Can you be that person for people in your life?

My dear friend, Sandy, gave me the greatest gift of the last several years.  She said, over her shoulder as she left my house one day, “You always make me believe that anything is possible.  I leave here and think, ‘I can do it.”  This, thankfully, also took root in my heart.  A few years later,  as I was searching for the connection between my talent and my passion, this comment blossomed.  It has been my touchstone every time I find my current path to be daunting.  What a blessing!

We can change people with our words.  Choose to say all those wonderful things you should say.  Tell people how you feel, and how you feel about them.  Be careful.  Proceed from a place of love. Always.

What comment do you need to let go so a positive comment can blossom?  Share with us–make it an intentional declaration.

 

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4 comments

  1. Jessica /

    Great post.

    • Jennette Cronk /

      Thank you, Jessica. We all have comments that rattle around in our heads that need to be cleared out–especially if they are becoming things we start believing about ourselves in harmful/hurtful ways. I have some “cleaning” to do myself.

  2. I let go of everything that isn’t completely necessary. It’s so important. Great post!

    • Jennette Cronk /

      You have a great skill, Jennifer. You have to let things go to be a happy person. Any tips on how you do it?

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