We try, don’t we?! Sometimes our best intentions turn into…well…Joffery. No matter which tactic you take to parent your children, and most of us combine several techniques, take heart—you probably aren’t as bad as most of these ladies!
*Spoilers make me feel sad inside. Don’t continue if you haven’t gotten all the way through Season 2. In honor of the return of my favorite TV show ever, I thought I’d re-post this goodie. We can all take heart in our ability as parents after some of these ladies!
Daenerys Targaryen: Nurturing Parent Model
She is the Mother of Dragons, literally, and she seems to have a handle on child-rearing. Putting her techniques into people terms, I would say she was following the nurturing parent model. This technique expects children to,
“explore their surroundings with protection from their parents. This model believes that children inherently know what they need and should be allowed to explore. The parents are responsible for protecting their child during this exploration, including protecting their child from themselves by offering guidance.”
She was on fire for her babies. Ok? She made sure they were fed when she didn’t even have food (in the desert), she cuddles them, trains them, and has disciplined them. She doesn’t abandon them and when Jorah protests– just because she didn’t carry them in her womb–she says calmly, “They are my children, and they are the only children I will ever have.” BAM! She represents ALL awesome moms–even animal mommies! She needs to offer some workshops in Westeros STAT!
Look at the risks we take for our children. Gladly.
Olenna Tyrell: Authoritarian
We don’t get to see enough of this woman! She’s sassy, brassy, and does what she can to keep those pesky grandkids in line. I think she may have followed the authoritarian method of parenting, characterized by
“setting clear standards for their children, monitor the limits that they set, and also allow children to develop autonomy. They also expect mature, independent, and age-appropriate behavior of children.”
She tells it like it is, accepts her grandkids for who they are, and tries to protect them. Three cheers to all those grandparents who are primary caretakers. Hip, Hip, Hooray!
Catelyn Stark: Neglectful Parenting /Over Parenting
She rides across Westeros seeking justice for her family. She morns. She wails. She makes wreaths. All while her newly disabled child and his younger brother, who is like 6, are left at home with no parents. Poor Catelyn swings wildly back and forth on the scale between over parenting (helicoptering over Rob) and straight-up neglectful parenting (Jon Snow). Tight work, Cat!
Her daughters don’t seem to benefit from her strong and fierce fighting nature. Why? Well because they are hundreds of miles away or lost in the woods. They never get to see how awesome their mom is as a woman in rough times. At least her children seem to be able to fend for themselves and seem to demonstrate fairly mature behavior. Survival instincts to the rescue!
Here she is in all her wreath-makin’, Jon-hatin’ glory:
Cersei Lannister: Indulgent parenting
Man, I can’t stand this woman!! She tries though, where her children are involved, to be a good mom. I think she is trying to be authoritative. Unfortunately, her good (?) intentions push her over into the realm of indulgent parenting. With this technique parents are,
“very involved with their children but place few demands or controls on them. Parents are nurturing and accepting, and are very responsive to the child’s needs and wishes. Indulgent parents do not require children to regulate themselves or behave appropriately.”
End result: Joffery. The. Worst. In this shining example of sound parenting, Cersei comforts her son as she tries to kill him.
In this example, she helps Sansa feel better about being a woman. She should have called Olenna! She would have been able to explain this “change” with a little more heart. Maybe.
Lysa Arryn: Crazy-Town Parenting
Speaking of indulgent parenting…uh…Lysa Arryn. Her crazy ways are raising a sniveling, whining, self-indulgent, brat! This kid, Robyn, shows no ability to control himself or make intelligent decisions. Watch out Joffry—he might give you a run for your money when he gets older!
In this scene, you can see how well adjusted Robin is!
Selyse Baratheon: Cult Member Parenting
No fear of of her daughter, Shireen, ever getting raped, attacked, or lost in the woods! She’s locked in a dungeon. Yay!! Also, she keeps dead babies in jars.
Melisandre: Cult Leader Parenting
I feel it is important to note Melisandre gives birth. Her child is a murderer in less than a day and then goes on to torture the survivors of oceanic Flight 814. Winning!
Well…she didn’t give her kid to a zombie! Well, really Sam did that. But she convinced Sam to help her! That’s something. Right? Also, she’s working on a a name, and names are hard.
I know. I shouldn’t be so hard on Gilly. She had a terrible childhood, is uneducated, unprepared, and inbred. She does care about her baby and is doing the best she can. We try, don’t we?!
P.S. All my information comes from Wikipedia. Take that APA format! Huzzah!
P.P. S. I’m bringing the wimple back! Bad hair day? Wrinkles? Double chin? Put a wimple on it.